It's easy to make someone happy and yet even easier to make someone upset. 

After this crazy summer, I am ready for a break and a little hibernation from the events, the trips, and the drama. At my very core, I just want to be happy and I genuinely want the same for everyone around me. 

I avoid potential conflict, not because it scares me, but because it escalates stupid arguments and creates a bigger rift than when it started. I let myself get hurt a lot. I let others take advantage of the generosity, I give far more than I would ever take, I let others feel belonging if it means that I get left out, and I will always go out of the way to inconvenience myself if it it makes things more convenient for others. Some people may call me stupid, but that is just who I am. I can't not open a door for someone. I can't not let someone else have a bigger slice of the pizza. It's just not in my nature. 

Believe me, it doesn't make me more liked as a person. If anything, people treat me with even less respect. I'm not stupid, I can see right through everybody. I get it, I don't live up to many people's standards. I hate trying to feel like I have to belong and that I'm the odd one out. It hurts me the way that people treat me sometimes, but do you know how I see it? I'd rather be hurt than have someone else feel hurt. If I don't get my first pick so that someone else could have their first pick, I would gladly make that sacrifice and for that, I have no regrets.

After everything, I still feel blessed. Everyone hates this word but I love it because when I am down, I just think about how blessed I am to have what I have, and it makes me smile. I have someone in my life who manages to make me smile every single time I cry (and I cry a lot) and never lets me forget that I'm the most special person in the world. I am so lucky. And I have my father who gave me everything I could possibly want, even giving me these challenges because he knows I can handle them. 

I think lately there were many times I had to shut everything out, close my eyes, take a deep breath and ask for guidance. My father has taught me well to hold my tongue, forgive quickly and move on. I think it's made me stronger and when I quickly look at all the wonderful things I have been blessed with in this past year, I think it's worth it.