:)

=if(Marilyn=job,":)",(:'(")

" CHANGES, I've never been good with change. "

I know I don't really make the first move much to see my friends, but I swear I am so busy I watched not one of my shows this week. NOT ONE.

I started my CMA on Sunday at BMO centre in Scarborough for a full day orientation. Man, the first assignment is tough. I had Sunday night to Friday night to do it (how are working people supposed to do assignments if you don't give them a weekend?!?). I just finished this week (now on to next week...) and I can finally get some rest. Did I mention I got a cold from work? The whole accounting department is a petri dish of viral bacteria. We are a choir of dry hacking and nose blowing.

I got a job, and subsequently quit a job. I also got a very negative response from my VP. This was my last week, and boy did they work me to the bone.

I am becoming more active in my church, which is a fantastic growing experience for me. I get to ask questions, get advice from older people and find comfort in discussion with people in this working age.

This week flew by, it really did. I am following all my goals except the sleeping part but I only get 5 hours a day from the time I get home from work to the time I go to sleep. That is not enough time to eat, shower, study and attend all my weekly commitments!!! This weekend I am sleeping for 15 hours, recovering from sickness, catching up on shows, and then... assignment.

P.S. I am free next week. All the hard work is worth it.

What a terrible night.

So I rearranged the furniture in my room yesterday and I had a restless last night with vivid dreams. My arms are SO sore, like I was wrestling all night.

First of all, I was up all night dry coughing and hacking away. I do miss those times when a cold was just a stuffy nose.

Most importantly, my dream was about the end of the world. I haven't been watching 2012 or any doomsday movies, so I don't know why my subconscious decided to freak me out about something so ridiculous.

So it was the end of the world and everyone was wide awake just anticipating it. We were all on this gigantic steel submarine (like 2012) but it was more like a huge yacht with living quarters inside. There were many people around me but I was alone staring at the city outside the window. It started off with a regular storm, and then the skies became dark purple/maroon. You could hear the water rising and you know at any moment it would engulf you and there was nothing you could do about it.

In my dream, I kept thinking how ironic it was how I blogged about the world not ending on 2012. My dream me knows about my blog! Anyway, I felt the grippling fear of my impending death and I had flashbacks of my life being spent doing some worthless things (mainly eating.) I wrestled with the thoughts of what I would do if I just had one more day. But I didn't, and then I started to anticipate the feeling of drowning to death and the reality of it (in my dream) was frightening. I began to pray to God that at the last moment, something, an angel perhaps, could just lift me up and swoop me away.

I don't know what happens next because I woke up hacking away again in a sweat. I was terrified but I wanted to know what happened so I went to sleep trying to preserve the ideas of my previous dream and it worked. Sorta.

Nothing happens and there is no end of the world, if not for another day. Everyone is relieved but live in fear thinking that doomsday could come at any time. Then the rest of my dream converted to a How I Met Your Mother episode focused on some co-worker hitting on Lily.

The end.

Sent from my IPhone.

These never work out by the way.

1. TAKE WHAT YOU WANT. Remember that episode of The Office where Pam got the wrong beer and she stood up for herself and asked for the light beer? I will stand up for myself because nobody else will.

2. Cut down on the junk food - For the past couple of months, I've packed on an enormous amount of weight due to my snacking habits. I crave chips like Eugene craves licking people. We all know I'm not going to work out - it's in my cards to be bigger than the rest of the girls. It's my character. But I refuse to gain more weight so instead of reaching for the cookie box, I will be reaching for oranges.

3. Stop being depressed about things I can't control and be happy about things I can control. I did not cause the economic crisis nor can I dictate the behavior of psychotic minds. I cannot control the mind of an HR "talent aquisition specialist" and make her handpick my resume from a computer database of 40,000 applicants. If it's not my time to shine, then relax and be patient... because you know that proverb about good things and waiting? It works.

4. Go outside more. And I don't mean to the mall.

Sent from my IPhone.