i need to scream, but what's the point when there's no one there to hear you? i hate everything about this. i just want it to be good but even when i try, it's not good. i need someone to be there for me, to show me that they care about me but to just be there. after trying again and again, nothing changes and nothing improves and a part of me acknowledges that nothing will change. this is why i know i am not staying. good or bad, it just all ends the same. i can't keep crying over a message never returned, a phone call never made, a visit never paid, a date that has never been planned, feelings that have never been shared, a secret never revealed. you don't have a secret anymore to hide. this is the last night i cry for you.

Nah, I won't let anything get me down. It's like freaking out about a bad hair day when it's the end of the world. There's no point.

I turn off my cellphone because if you don't call, I won't be disappointed.